I Need To Move

Post #69!  Laugh it up, folks. 

Today will be a small tale of frustration.  Feel free to give me advice on how to best handle this situation because I have no clue.  I felt like I was in elementary school again dealing with an immature older kid on the bus, or something like that. 

I was happily drinking beer and watching Drew Brees slowly but surely rack up tons of fantasy points for two of my teams.  Mrs. P. had gone to the gym and had let our cat outside when she left.  Some background on our cat:

- He's extremely smart.  We let him outside in Downtown Sacramento and he walks around our block only, has a grassy hiding place, and is click-trained.  When we walk outside with a clicker, he typically knows it is time to go home (and get cat treats.) 

- He, to our knowledge, is mostly scared of strangers.  He doesn't usually come out of hiding, even with us clicking, if he hears strangers making loud noises. 

- Mrs. P. and I love him like a son, but he is an asshole when we don't let him out for a few days.  He enjoys his outside time and like I said, is typically pretty safe about it. 

"Rawr!"

Ok, so at some point during the 3rd quarter, I realized our cat hadn't come home and it was getting dark.  I decided to pause the game and go clicking for him.  I was 3 or 4 beers deep.  Probably buzzed, but not drunk.  I walked a few buildings down from our complex to the broken fence that he usually hides behind.  On my way over to this spot, there was a group of hoodlums hanging out at the end of the walkway between two buildings.  It was diversity at its finest- an Asian guy, a Mexican guy, and Caucasian hipster.  I wondered where their hypothetical Black friend was to complete this beautiful diversity rainbow. 

Kind of like this!

I walked past them and clicked a couple times to see if our cat would come out.  The guys were loudly hanging out and smoking cigarettes, so I was skeptical that our cat would reveal himself.  I get that a guy clicking a clicker around your building is a little weird, but one of these guys definitely wanted to start trouble. 

The Asian guy had a flashlight (for some reason) and he shined the light at me like he was Kevin James in "Paul Blart." 

"Excuse me, sir... do you live here?" as he flashed the light up and down a couple times. 

"No man, I'm just looking for my cat." 

"Sir, sir- I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

I look at him confused.  "I'm just looking for my cat."

"Don't you hate it when dick security guards do that?" he asks.  Then he laughs to himself and continues to repeat the flashlight schtick once more.  

The White hipster asks, "Is it the fluffy black and white one?" 

I confirm those details, not thinking much of it. 

The Asian guy pipes back up.  "Do you have a cigarette?"  (I don't smoke and I had nothing on my person besides the clicker.)

"No, I don't have any cigarettes." 

He angrily stares at me as if I just said, "Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees, look at these!" 

He breaks the silence by asking me if I'm from Chicago (I was wearing a Bears t-shirt.) 

"Yes, I was born there."  I'm still clicking to find my cat and get the fuck out of there. 

I think he was silenced again because his tactic was going to be to give me a hard time for wearing a Chicago shirt when I wasn't from Chicago.  This guy was clearly bored and wanted to get a rise out of me. 

He then said in a baby-ish voice, "Awww, you miss your pussy.  You miss your pussy."  I think he then made kissy noises.  I had reached the end of my tolerance level. 

"Is there some kind of problem?" I asked annoyed, but still calm. 

He gives me the confrontational, "No!  I'm just trying to have a conversation!"  Yeah.  Fucking.  Right. 

"Oh, really?  It doesn't seem like you're trying to have any kind of a conversation.  I'm just going to find my cat and get out of here."  I turned to face him. 

Let's pause for a minute.  I still haven't found my cat.  There are three guys that all look like they have been in fights previously.  I can't imagine a world where this Asian guy hasn't been kicked in the face a couple times.  There is no way I can even consider fighting these guys on the sidewalk in front of my complex.  My biggest concern now is my cat.  They pretty much know which cat it is, so if I don't retrieve him, he could be in danger.  However, he is not coming out from hiding and I think he's smart enough to stay hiding until these d-bags leave. 

I start to walk away, and their hypothetical Black friend that I wasn't sure existed joins them.  He asks what was going on, and the Asian guy says something about "Chicago Bulls over there starting trouble."  What a dick.  He clearly is not the best with details.  I was wearing a Bears shirt and he was the one starting trouble.

Luckily, his group of friends did not join him in this asshole-ary and I walked back to my place.  At this point, I was worried about my cat and it was hard to enjoy the game.  Another lucky thing was that Drew Brees decided to take over the game, so that was a good distraction.  I was still a little nervous about our little fur-ball's safety. 

In the most anti-climatic end ever, about 7 minutes later, I heard him meowing at our door.  He made it home safe and sound.  What a smart little guy. 

So now what do we do?  I'm not sure if this Asian guy lives a couple buildings down, or if he was visiting his friends.  The White guy clearly lives there because he knew what our cat looked like.  Also, there are a few other black and white cats in the neighborhood, so it is possible that they wouldn't recognize him.  Can we let him out again?  He loves going outside, but I'm now concerned about these assholes messing with him?  He was smart enough to get home, so maybe he can take care of himself.  Maybe this group of guys thinks their friend is a tool and they'll tell him he was being an asshole.  I have no idea. 

At the moment, I'm glad our cat is safe and sound.  I'm also glad that Drew Brees is a stud.  What say you?  Should I have fought all three and then four guys?  Do you think it was late and these guys were clearly drinking and bored?  Is it safe to let our cat out anymore?  Ponder these questions and make sure to have a safe weekend for you and your pets!