Monday, August 22, 2011

Very Superstitious, Writing's On The Wall

After playing a show on Friday night, I had the good fortune to attend my friend's bachelor party in Tahoe.  It was great to catch up with a some of my friends that I do not see as much as I'd like.  However, there were a few inherent problems that caught up with me during the trip:

1) I tried my best to get up there early, but I had gotten home late from my show on Friday- I was running on about 5 hours of sleep.

2) The rest of the group had been up there since Thursday.  Everyone was understandably less energetic and it was hard for me to inject more energy due to problem #1. 

3) As my few loyal readers know, I highly prefer Reno because I'm extremely familiar with the area at this point.  Tahoe tends to throw me off my game. 

These problems aside, I started drinking Jack and Coke pretty much upon arrival at 12:15pm.  We had a cabin in Zephyr Cove with a ridiculous view of the beach.  It was three stories and included a hot tub primed for homo-erotic action!  I think there may have been attempts to get girls to come back to the cabin, but given that a majority of the group was married, it could've easily broken down into a bunch of making up stories for our own amusement.  Much like this:

We went down to the beach with some lawn chairs and beers.  At some point, a party girl came over trying to bum a beer off of us.  We gave her one and she took a seat in one of the chairs (why, yes- help yourself... I'm sure we'd love your company...)

Nooooo... it was not her.  Close though.
She was a train wreck.  She had moved back to Tahoe for the summer after getting laid off in NYC.  She claimed she hadn't been sober in three weeks.  You could tell she was classy.  My friend Phil came back over from hanging out near the water and he was wearing the most ridiculous shirt ever.  It had a large picture of a young Mexican boy in a cowboy outfit holding what appeared to be two loaded guns and a fake mustache. 

Due to Phil's racial ambiguity (he's half white, half Asian) many people asked if the picture was of him.  He would chose his answers at random- sometimes it was, sometimes it wasn't and he'd just make up stories about the shirt.  The party girl asked if it was him, he said it was, and introduced himself as Eduardo. 

From there we just began making up stories about his family from Mexico City and a fake trip that we all went on 2 or 3 years ago to visit his relatives.  The most ridiculous portion of the story was when I mentioned "Eduardo's Uncle Paco" and the "odd beard he grew on his face.  He looked like a Mexican wizard!" 

Maybe like this?
Somehow we transitioned to talking about how Uncle Paco's body was relatively hairless besides his beard AND his lower back hair.  Phil then kicked it up a notch by saying that he had shaped the lower back hair in the shape of the beard so that it pointed downwards at his ass-crack.  The girl probably believed most of it, but that was because she was very drunk and definitely a skank. 

Eventually, we went back to the cabin, freshened up, had a great meal that some of the guys cooked.  It really felt like a Jersey Shore Sunday dinner. 

After dinner, we headed out to the Lakeside Inn & Casino.  I had never been to this particular casino, but I figured it would have lower limits on their small array of tables.  WRONG!  I'm not sure what kind of collusion is going on in Tahoe, but you cannot find a $5 Craps table to save your life there!  At least on a Friday or Saturday night. 

Anyway, here's my main complaint of the evening.  My friends and I had fun taking over one side of the table, and I probably didn't leave because of that fact alone.  There was no asshole to make us uncomfortable, so there was no motivation to move it along.  However, here are my issues with my gaming experience from Saturday night (besides the fact that the dice crushed me.)

- The Craps table was extra long and the surface was extra bouncy.  The dice were flying everywhere and it was borderline dangerous. 

- The dealers were quite cocky for working at the Lakeside Inn & Casino.  Nice story about how all the dealers who work "down at the Strip" aren't as experienced as the ones at Lakeside.  You're trying to tell me that Harrah's has worse dealers?  Slow your role, broseph.

- He followed that story up, but tell my friend playing next to me that he could place a bet for the dealers by placing a chip next to his bet.  I was already doing that occasionally, so I guess he felt like he needed to inform my friend like a beggar, how to give him tips.  He then said, "We make less than minimum wage, we are here for the tips..."  Oh, great.  So you and all your experienced dealers are looking for big tips while dealing Craps at Lakeside?  Once again, you may want to step up your game and go to the place with more money if you all are so awesome. 

- Another dealer began talking about how he went to a Sheryl Crow and Kid Rock concert awhile back.  He thought that Sheryl Crow was "wonderful! She sounded just like the CD!"  To which I thought, "So it is still terrible?"  He then said Kid Rock was "a phenomenal performer!  If you get a chance to see him, do NOT miss out!"  Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.

Voted best performer by "White Trash That Resemble Chickens Magazine."
My new rule needs to be: If any dealers start talking about the greatness of Kid Rock, Nickelback, or any other shitty "musician," walk away from the table immediately.  Said rule will be enforced strictly. Yes, I'm a superstitious gambler, and that has been added to the list of superstitions.

You can talk about Stevie Wonder, though.  That's cool with me.
In the end, we did meander down to the Strip and I was less than pleased with my gambling for the evening.  Mixing that with fatigue, it kind of put a damper on the night.  However, I will say that it was great to see my friends (most of them from college) so the night was not a loss.  At least hanging out with them could make the gambling loss less painful. 

Overall, it was a quick and fun trip.  While I prefer Reno to Tahoe, it is nice to get a change of scenery ever-so-often.  The cabin was definitely legit and allowed for a great view of the fantastic nature of the Tahoe area. 

2 comments:

GMoney said...

I've always wanted to have a Jersey Shore Sunday dinner. No one cooks chicken like Sitch.

Terrelle Pryor comin' yo! Time to move out of NorCal.

Prime99 said...

Luckily TP will fit right in with all the gang bangers in Oakland. I stay away from that area as much as possible. There is a less than 0% chance I go to Oakland when the Bears come to town this year. As we've seen this weekend, watching Bay Area NFL teams live is no joke.