More words have been wasted on Cubs' player Carlos Zambrano than any other baseball player this past decade. Media members have debated Zambrano's effectiveness, mental stability, and whether or not he can be a decent teammate in the Majors.
Friday, Big Z was ejected from the game against the Braves after throwing at Chipper Jones.
He angrily left the game, cleaned out his locker, and told a clubhouse attendant that he's "retiring." Since then, Zambrano has recanted his claim of retirement, but the Cubs are fed up. They suspended him for 30 days without pay by placing him on the disqualified list.
I mentioned last week that I'm done with baseball this season. I pretty much still am, but I find the Zambrano situation interesting enough to write about. Here's a guy who was a #4 starter for the 2003 Cubs playoff team, then grew into a legit #1 starter. In 2007 and 2008 the Cubs made it to the playoffs, but were swept in both series 0-3 to retain their title as the "Loveable Losers." Since that point, the Cubs have underachieved with the 3rd highest payroll in baseball, and Zambrano is a HUGE reason why (fat pun intended.)
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| "All of these problems are because of you!!!" |
As a Cubs fan, I'm obviously sick of Zambrano's shit. His tantrums are tired and his performance does not warrant $18 - $19 million per year. In many ways, Z is the face of the franchise and that is sad and embarrassing. In comparison to another controversial Chicago sports figure, I much prefer Jay Cutler to Zambrano. In no way am I joking. Cutler is practically Derek Jeter compared to Zambrano (and don't lose your mind- I'm not comparing Cutler to Jeter, I'm merely stating how much of a shitty douche bag Zambrano is.)
Zambrano retiring is one easy way to solve this problem. It would save the Cubs a solid $6 million or so this year, $18 million next year, and potentially (with a vesting option) $19 million in 2013. Well, it sounds like Z doesn't want to give tens of millions of dollars like he said he was going to, so what the hell are the other options? No, seriously- what are the OTHER OPTIONS?! I have no idea.
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| The Cubs could hire someone with a very "specific set of skills" to take care of things. |
What I've heard, is that the Cubs will likely either eat the contract and release him, or attempt to trade him in a similar fashion that they did Milton Bradley two years ago. The Bradley trade netted them bad apple Carlos Silva, so I can't imagine what other team would entertain a worthwhile trade for a cancer that will likely fight with teammates in the dugout and tear any team to pieces. That would be like getting offered sex by a 7 out of 10 fully knowing they are HIV positive and saying, "Eh- let's roll the dice. We'll see how this plays out." Anyone who trades or signs Big Z is crazy and has to know it won't end well.
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| "I know about rolling the dice on skanks." |
As much as Giants fans hate Barry Zito, and they HATE Zito, I don't think even they would want to trade Zito for Big Z straight up. I just don't see a situation that would work for #38 besides him getting released and deported.
So where do we go from here? I could make my list of Zambrano's finest fights and/or tantrums, but that would take more research and effort than I have to give this has-been dickhead. I could wax ecstatic about how much I wish Kerry Wood was still a starter or how much I was Mark Prior was healthy and on the Cubs, but that is also a waste of electronic ink.
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| This image brings a tear to my eye. |
Instead, I'll end by saying the Cubs need to completely overhaul their organization. They need a "Hoarders'" psychologist to go over and tell them that they need to clean out the mold and trash that has been gathering for years and years. Clean the house. No more band aids of new and fashionable hitting coaches. No more overpaying Ryan Dempster, Aramis Ramirez, Alfonso Soriano, Carlos Pena, etc, etc, etc. No more allowing Jim Hendry to keep his job when he's done absolutely nothing to deserve to stay in his position. Let's stop this train wreck and start the rebuilding process. The status quo of the Chicago Cubs is sickening.
3 comments:
Yes! I knew there'd be a Zambrano post today. If getting paid $19 million doesn't make you take your job seriously, nothing will. If he couldn't throw a baseball, Carlos would be an angry janitor somewhere, until he punched a kid in the throat for scuffing up his floors and his third world country gave him the death penalty.
As a Giants fan, I don't hate Barry Zito. I hate his contract, yes, but I can't blame him for signing it and continue to make his money. He may hover between average and replacement-level from year to year, but he's never pitched a fit or acted like a spoiled, whiny bitch. You can keep Big Z's contract and I'll be content with an 80% chance of losing every 5th game.
Here's your trade that makes all the damn sense in the world and solves two problems...
Zambrano for Adam Dunn
The money is similar and you need another terrible stick to replace Carlos Pena this offseason. And when you lose out on Prince and Albert, hey, at least you got someone!
Straight from a Giants fan's mouth. Zito is in fact a better contract than Z because Zeets is less destructive in the clubhouse.
It makes me absolutely sick to actually like the Adam Dunn for Z deal. Big Z would play for and make out with Ozzie, and Adam Dunn would bring his strikeouts to Wrigley. It actually makes sense. Disgusting.
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