Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Laziest Shit I've Ever Seen

I tend to write about annoying people from the gym a lot.  I'm not sure it is so much that lots annoying people exist at the gym, it's probably more that annoying people are everywhere and I tend to regularly go to the gym.  The gym is just the place I happen run into these bottom feeders. 

So I attended my usual weightlifting class at a location I had never been to until yesterday (I got to 24 Hour Fitness and can go to any location.)  The class instructor was not the best, but certainly not the worst, so my experience was mostly average. 

The main part of this story occurs half way through the class.  An overweight Asian girl walks into class late, finds a spot in the middle of the floor, and begins to gather her weights.  My first thought was, "Wow, I can't believe this fat girl is even trying to start class now, she already missed half of it!  Oh well, good for her.  Maybe she got caught up at work or something." 

She looked like this with much, much less muscle definition.
She collected heavier weight than I would have guessed would be appropriate.  She also gathered lighter dumbbells that some of the women in class use.  It was a confusing collection of weight selections (hey, that rhymes!)  I was interested, so I continued to observe as she started to join the class. 

Hilariously, she began to lift with the class and after literally four reps she realized the bar was too heavy.  Instead of just taking some weight off of the bar like a normal person, she took weight off the bar and walked it all the way back over to the weight racks.  Most people take weight on and off the bar during class and there really is no need to put away any weights until the conclusion of class.  This girl had just gotten these weights, and used the weight as an excuse to do less exercise!  Brilliant!  She is being a lazy fat fuck at an optional class that she does not even have to be at! 

She then picks up some of the dumbbells she selected.  After five or six reps, those are now too heavy!  She walks all the way over and slowly switches out weights while the rest of the class continues their workout.  It was fucking unreal.  There was clearly no point in her even going to half-a-class that she had no desire to participate in.  I guess she mentally wanted to feel like, "Yeah, I went to workout class- it was difficult.  Now, let me treat myself guilt-free to some Jack-In-The-Box!"  What a piece of shit. 

If she was going to clean so much, at least she could've looked like this.
Oh, but she was not done!  This out-of-shape Sumo-Wrestler-Looking woman had one more trick up her sleeve.  The last station of class is when we do an ab workout.  Many people in class who I like to refer to as "underachievers" or "quitters" will begin putting away their weights and completely skip the ab workout without even trying.  I thought that this girl would certainly stay for abs since she showed up halfway through, then spent most of the class walking back and forth to the weight racks or dumbbell boxes.  Of course, she begins to put away her weights in order to clean her area and effectively skip the ab workout. 

"Abs? Hehe, I think not."
In total, I'm guessing she got a solid 45 seconds of working out, though from looking at the amount of sweat beading off her thick piggy arms, one would think she ran a marathon.  She did a great job of distracting and infuriating me (and other class members commented on it also) for no good reason at all.  I have made a lot of fat jokes today and do I honestly have a problem with fat people?  No, I do not.  I have a problem with people who show up to workout and don't even try just so they can give themselves a false sense of effort.  I highly respect overweight people giving it their best effort in class.  I find it admirable that they are taking steps to make themselves healthier.  I do not respect someone who comes into class just to make a big scene, distract the rest of the people who want to be there, just so they can accomplish nothing.  That- I find disgusting. 

In the end, I will bet any amount of money that this girl putting away her weights throughout class would not put that much effort in to clean her own place of residence.  She seems like the laziest person I have ever come across in all my days.

4 comments:

Observer said...

So the confusing collection of weight selections reflected her predilection for a large cross-section?

GMoney said...

I highly respect overweight people

RIP Yokozuna

Speaking of which, I'm pumped like Hell to go to Raw in less than two weeks. I haven't given Vincent Kennedy McMahon any of my money since the 2002 King of the Ring PPV where I sat at the top row of teh building to watch Hogan beat Kurt Angle (I think) and Brock Lesnar win the crown.

Mrs. P said...

and during those 4 squat reps she did... she faced a different direction than the rest of the class and forced that bulbous rump right into my line of vision. She may not have been motivated... but her huge ass certainly motivated me

Prime99 said...

Observer, I have no idea what you said- but you touched a brother's heart. I think she intentionally got more weight than she could handle, so she would have an excuse to not actually use the weights. It was a lazy bluff to trick herself into believing she was actually working out. It was a sight to behold.

There you go G$- always bringing it back to WWE. I love it!

Mrs. P.- She was one of the worst people I've ever witnessed got through class. Even worse than the cocky in-shape girl, skinny Indian man with no rhythm/technique, mom of the teacher, and also person who pushes you out of the way for weights. All awful people in their own right.