Dear Chicago Bears,
Fuck you. You've ruined this NFL season. You now sit at 2-3 and have two teams, in your division perched at 5-0 (and both of them have already beaten you.) This is a disaster. Do you know what the crazy thing is? I fucking love a lot of the players.
True, Jay Cutler has his quirks, but who gives a fuck? Body language or dating a girl on Dancing With The Stars has no bearing on his ability to throw the ball- and that, he does quite well. So well, in fact, that he's likely the best Bears QB of my lifetime. I probably said that before, but it is true.
MATT FORTE is unreal. The guy is the best player on the team, yet the Bears won't pay him. What in holy hell are they doing? They should back up a Brinks truck to his house, then later deliver him the maximum amount of Amish Electric Fireplaces by horse and carriage!
"How do you combine Amish craftsmanship with modern technology? The Amish aren't telling!"
Seriously. Pay Matt Forte. Do it. Let the man stay in Chicago and play Running Back!!!
I sort of like their receivers. Not enough to not want them to find better ones, but Johnny Knox is explosive and under utilized. Earl Bennet is injured. Dane Sanzenbacher looks to be solid once he finishes going through puberty. Add an explosive #1 to that group, and you might have something... that is... unless...
THE OFFENSE LINE IS FUCKING AWFUL. Frank Omiyale looks like he shits himself every time he has to get out of his crouch to block a guy. He might as well be 75 years old using a walker that as tennis balls placed on the bottom of each spoke. Figure it the fuck out, Bears. PS: Why did you trade Greg Olsen? Kellen Davis sucks.
I love me some Brian Urlacher, Lance Briggs, and Julius Peppers. However, Briggs complains about money every other year and the Bears have other pressing matters to attend to (see the aforementioned Matt Forte.) The Bears' secondary is saint-like (read as: HOLE-Y.) There clearly are issues for a team that is supposed to be defensive minded.
I'm guessing that when the team over-achieved last year (which was awesome), GM Jerry Angelo said, "Eh, we're not that bad!" And then he didn't do shit (besides trade away an explosive offensive weapon in Greg Olsen for a 32nd round draft pick.)
Don't do this, Bears. I don't know how good the Blackhawks are, and it looks like the Bulls' season will be canceled. Don't tank this season. I need to see something next week on Sunday night.
Ouch. Vikings vs. Bears... what a ratings monster that will be.
Sincerely, your fan,
Prime 99
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Monday, October 10, 2011
NFL Week 5
In a raspy voice, "The Raiders... the Raiders will win!"
And they did. This win was surely dedicated to this man who meant so much to a proud franchise:
It's an odd thing. For YEARS I've heard friends of mine who are Raider fans (I only allow a maximum of 3 Raider fans a time to be my friends) say, "We just have to wait until Al Davis dies- then we will be good again!" Then oddly, the Raiders finish 8-8 last year and look decent this year, and all of a sudden, it is a tragedy when Big Al dies. I suppose it makes sense. Death usually gives the deceased a bump in public opinion. I will say that the Raiders came up HUGE with a win in Texas this weekend, so that is definitely a positive boost for the mourning fan base.
Let's look at some other highlights/lowlights before getting to the weekly fantasy football update:
- Holy 49ers, Batman! As my friend and occasional commenter Dick Tracy said, "That was a dick-stomping!" And he's right. The Niners looked as good as I've seen in years. I am a huge Josh Freeman and Bucs hater (though that came back to bite me last week in fantasy) so I'm not going to sit here and say the Niners are "elite." However, they looked damn good on offense and defense, not to mention they have Ted Ginn, Jr. returning kicks/punts. Jim Harbaugh is building his team correctly.
- Tim Te-boner got in the game to replace the bearded Kyle Orton. He ran around in circles only to lead a comeback against the Chargers. While the Broncos ultimately fell short, I can't imagine that John Fox does not stick with Tebow for the rest of the year. He allowed fan chants to get Tebow in the game, so he has to stick with Football Jesus. Orton weakly clapping on the sideline after Tebow led a touchdown drive shows that Orton knows he's finished in Denver (and probably as a starter in the NFL.) At least he can make money holding a clip board. I'd do it, if they'd let me.
- I love Drew Brees. The Saints look so-so and still pull out the win against Cam Newton and the Panthers. Not only that, the Saints even tried to start a fight! I agree that Steve Smith was dogging it into the end zone to rub it in, but Roman Harper should know better than to hit Smith in the end zone well after Smith crossed the goal line. There are plenty of basketball players I wish I could've laid a cheap shot on in high school, however, I was smart enough to do it legally during game action while the refs weren't watching.
- The Eagles are falling apart worse than Al Davis' corpse. I have no idea how or why, but the Eagles are inexplicably 1-4. Michael Vick is still dangerous, but he is prone to injury and stupidity. His O-Line is certainly not helping him out. The Nightmare Team needs to figure some shit out quickly. Hopefully they don't because they play the Bears in a month.
- The Packers are scary. Just when you think a decent Falcons team has them in a bad spot at 14-0, their defense cracks down and Aaron Rodgers leads a comeback. I hate the Packers. To me, they are the AIDS of the NFL. However, Aaron Rodgers isprobably the best QB in the game.
Ok, fantasy time... let's go in reverse order of quality:
Family and Friends:
CORE 71.90 - BossHogg 74.16
My team is terrible. Phillip Rivers probably lives under the boardwalk at the Jersey Shore. The only way I win is at the expense of the Bears. I have Javid Best left and he has Matt Forte and Bears D. I hope I lose by a wide margin.
MSFL:
Murder Panties 146 - The Million Dollar Men 114
This is quickly becoming my favorite league. I really care about beating a group of people that I either don't know, or haven't seen in over 20 years. The exception, of course, is my opponent this week- G$. Previously undefeated, G$ put up a good fight with a great Kevin Walters pick up, but the Bye Week was too much to overcome (he only had MJD as an active RB from his normal roster.) The Bye Week even swung things to my advantage because I started Pierre Garcon instead of my normal play of Santana Moss. 30 points for a Colt! Unheard of this year. The match is over, but I still have Robbie Gould tonight.
Not Cali Keepers:
Peppermill High Rollers 83 - Indy Bound 76
I remained dominant this week. He has no one left and I have Forte, Best, and the Lions or Bears D to go tonight. I highly doubt his team name prediction will come true. He started Mark Sanchez this week, so I'm going to predict that that move disqualifies him right there. I'll probably start the Bears D, since I have Forte and Best to pad the lead if the game goes in a bad direction. I will listen to advice if I should just bench both defenses though.
---
I'm so ready for tonight. This should be a fun game. I'm happy for the Lions to be getting back to respectability, but they are only a few weeks (or possibly hours) away from me hating their guts. Go Bears!
And they did. This win was surely dedicated to this man who meant so much to a proud franchise:
 |
| "Commitment to BRAAAAAAINS!" |
Let's look at some other highlights/lowlights before getting to the weekly fantasy football update:
- Holy 49ers, Batman! As my friend and occasional commenter Dick Tracy said, "That was a dick-stomping!" And he's right. The Niners looked as good as I've seen in years. I am a huge Josh Freeman and Bucs hater (though that came back to bite me last week in fantasy) so I'm not going to sit here and say the Niners are "elite." However, they looked damn good on offense and defense, not to mention they have Ted Ginn, Jr. returning kicks/punts. Jim Harbaugh is building his team correctly.
- Tim Te-boner got in the game to replace the bearded Kyle Orton. He ran around in circles only to lead a comeback against the Chargers. While the Broncos ultimately fell short, I can't imagine that John Fox does not stick with Tebow for the rest of the year. He allowed fan chants to get Tebow in the game, so he has to stick with Football Jesus. Orton weakly clapping on the sideline after Tebow led a touchdown drive shows that Orton knows he's finished in Denver (and probably as a starter in the NFL.) At least he can make money holding a clip board. I'd do it, if they'd let me.
- I love Drew Brees. The Saints look so-so and still pull out the win against Cam Newton and the Panthers. Not only that, the Saints even tried to start a fight! I agree that Steve Smith was dogging it into the end zone to rub it in, but Roman Harper should know better than to hit Smith in the end zone well after Smith crossed the goal line. There are plenty of basketball players I wish I could've laid a cheap shot on in high school, however, I was smart enough to do it legally during game action while the refs weren't watching.
- The Eagles are falling apart worse than Al Davis' corpse. I have no idea how or why, but the Eagles are inexplicably 1-4. Michael Vick is still dangerous, but he is prone to injury and stupidity. His O-Line is certainly not helping him out. The Nightmare Team needs to figure some shit out quickly. Hopefully they don't because they play the Bears in a month.
- The Packers are scary. Just when you think a decent Falcons team has them in a bad spot at 14-0, their defense cracks down and Aaron Rodgers leads a comeback. I hate the Packers. To me, they are the AIDS of the NFL. However, Aaron Rodgers is
Ok, fantasy time... let's go in reverse order of quality:
Family and Friends:
CORE 71.90 - BossHogg 74.16
My team is terrible. Phillip Rivers probably lives under the boardwalk at the Jersey Shore. The only way I win is at the expense of the Bears. I have Javid Best left and he has Matt Forte and Bears D. I hope I lose by a wide margin.
MSFL:
Murder Panties 146 - The Million Dollar Men 114
This is quickly becoming my favorite league. I really care about beating a group of people that I either don't know, or haven't seen in over 20 years. The exception, of course, is my opponent this week- G$. Previously undefeated, G$ put up a good fight with a great Kevin Walters pick up, but the Bye Week was too much to overcome (he only had MJD as an active RB from his normal roster.) The Bye Week even swung things to my advantage because I started Pierre Garcon instead of my normal play of Santana Moss. 30 points for a Colt! Unheard of this year. The match is over, but I still have Robbie Gould tonight.
Not Cali Keepers:
Peppermill High Rollers 83 - Indy Bound 76
I remained dominant this week. He has no one left and I have Forte, Best, and the Lions or Bears D to go tonight. I highly doubt his team name prediction will come true. He started Mark Sanchez this week, so I'm going to predict that that move disqualifies him right there. I'll probably start the Bears D, since I have Forte and Best to pad the lead if the game goes in a bad direction. I will listen to advice if I should just bench both defenses though.
---
I'm so ready for tonight. This should be a fun game. I'm happy for the Lions to be getting back to respectability, but they are only a few weeks (or possibly hours) away from me hating their guts. Go Bears!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Wild Generalizations That I'm Unqualified To Make
While in accounting class last night, I turned on my MLB At-Bat app on my iPhone (RIP, Steve.) I watched the internet updates for the 7th - 9th innings. You know what my take away is from watching those?
A-ROD IS TERRIBLE.
Seriously. He's the highest paid guy in the league. He failed in the 7th with the bases loaded and struck out to end the game. Yikes. $27 mil a year for a mental midget? A-no-thank-you. I'd be interested to hear G$'s take on this. As a Yankees fan, you cannot be happy about A-Rod. I will agree that he played well in 2009 and that helped the Bombers win the Series. As A-Rod goes, the Yankees go- and that cannot be comforting for Yankee fans.
Ivan Nova was put in a tough spot. It is hard to blame a rookie for folding up a bit at Yankee Stadium during a deciding Game 5. I think Nova will be solid for years to come as long as he doesn't pull a Rich Hill. Yeah, I brought Rich Hill into this rambling- wanna fight about it?
On to other baseball notes, I'm paying more attention to the Cubs possibly acquiring Theo Epstein than I did for the last 3 months of Cubs' season. Do I want Theo to be the Cubs GM? Pretty much. I'm not totally sold on him, but he did give the Red Sox a solid infrastructure. He certainly knows how to balance big spending with developing talent. He also knows about breaking "curses." I wouldn't be mad if the Cubs also looked at some young, qualified assistant GM's around the league. However, if they ultimately get Epstein, I'll be excited to see what he can do to turn the Cubs' fortune around.
Chris Carpenter vs. Roy Halladay
What a touching story about two former Blue Jays who were best friends and discussed pitching techniques early in their career. Now they face each other in a deciding Game 5! What are the odds?!? Well, pretty good actually. They are both #1 starters on two of the best teams in the NL. It stands to reason they would face off in the playoffs. Is it fun to compete against your friends? You bet your ass it is. One of them will have bragging rights forever. Unfortunately, I can't cheer for either team because I hate both of them.
I mildly like Arizona, but truthfully, I don't care about their Game 5.
Detroit vs. Texas is going to make House Party look like House Party 2! I'd rather drink magnesium citrate two hours before going to a fancy dinner party than watch this garbage.
And that's all the rambling I have left in me. Baseball is dead to me (until the Cubs win the offseason.) Have a great weekend and here's a message to The Million Dollar Men... I'm coming for ya.
A-ROD IS TERRIBLE.
Seriously. He's the highest paid guy in the league. He failed in the 7th with the bases loaded and struck out to end the game. Yikes. $27 mil a year for a mental midget? A-no-thank-you. I'd be interested to hear G$'s take on this. As a Yankees fan, you cannot be happy about A-Rod. I will agree that he played well in 2009 and that helped the Bombers win the Series. As A-Rod goes, the Yankees go- and that cannot be comforting for Yankee fans.
 |
| It hurts so good... |
On to other baseball notes, I'm paying more attention to the Cubs possibly acquiring Theo Epstein than I did for the last 3 months of Cubs' season. Do I want Theo to be the Cubs GM? Pretty much. I'm not totally sold on him, but he did give the Red Sox a solid infrastructure. He certainly knows how to balance big spending with developing talent. He also knows about breaking "curses." I wouldn't be mad if the Cubs also looked at some young, qualified assistant GM's around the league. However, if they ultimately get Epstein, I'll be excited to see what he can do to turn the Cubs' fortune around.
Chris Carpenter vs. Roy Halladay
What a touching story about two former Blue Jays who were best friends and discussed pitching techniques early in their career. Now they face each other in a deciding Game 5! What are the odds?!? Well, pretty good actually. They are both #1 starters on two of the best teams in the NL. It stands to reason they would face off in the playoffs. Is it fun to compete against your friends? You bet your ass it is. One of them will have bragging rights forever. Unfortunately, I can't cheer for either team because I hate both of them.
I mildly like Arizona, but truthfully, I don't care about their Game 5.
Detroit vs. Texas is going to make House Party look like House Party 2! I'd rather drink magnesium citrate two hours before going to a fancy dinner party than watch this garbage.
And that's all the rambling I have left in me. Baseball is dead to me (until the Cubs win the offseason.) Have a great weekend and here's a message to The Million Dollar Men... I'm coming for ya.
Thursday, October 6, 2011
90s Rock: Best Songs (Part 4)
And finally, continuing on from last week, here are my last group of favorite 90s songs. There really are too many songs that are awesome. My list is probably hobo excrement. Oh well, it has been fun anyway.
16) "Photograph" by The Verve Pipe
I went through a phase where I listened to TONS of The Verve Pipe. They are an excellent band. They are not in my Top 10 favorite bands of all time, or anything, but they have an underrated catalog. Much like this song. "Photograph" was the first song I ever remember hearing by them. Of course, they later found more notoriety with "The Freshmen" but the sick organ track that underpins this song is not to be denied. Give it a listen if you don't recall this song.
"Cup Of Tea" is also another underrated song by The Verve Pipe.
17) "Lakini's Juice" by Live
There is no arguing that "Throwing Copper" is Live's best record. However, my favorite overall song by Live is "Lakini's Juice." If you can't tell by now, I am a huge fan of dirty, deep guitar riffs. The distorted bass creeps into your ears like a burrowing earwig. It also uses excellent subtle placement of string arrangements. You can't go wrong here.
18) "Still Remains" by Stone Temple Pilots
The only band with two songs on the list. I just couldn't leave this one off. It makes the list with the following line alone: "Take a bath, I'll drink the water that you leave." It's pretty gross, twisted love song- and I love it.
19) "Little Things" by Bush
My band in high school used to rock the shit out of this song in our garages. One of our favorites to cover, "Little Things" is simple yet rocking. Why Bush didn't take the music industry by the throat and skull-fuck it, I'll never understand. "Sixteen Stone" is amazing. The rest of their catalog... just ok. This song deserves a spot on the list though.
What's that? You want shirtless Gavin Rossdale from Woodstock '99? Ok!
20) "Tomorrow" by Silverchair
Silverchair deserves a spot on the list. This is their first hit single in the US and probably their catchiest song (at least from their early catalog.) This song is most impressive given that it was written, performed and recorded by 14/15 year olds. Daniel Johns sings like a 40 year old. It is a solid song to round out the Top 20.
And so ends my Top 20. I should do this again in 3 months and I bet I'd get a different list. Enjoy all the Game 5's coming up, they should be fairly entertaining.
16) "Photograph" by The Verve Pipe
I went through a phase where I listened to TONS of The Verve Pipe. They are an excellent band. They are not in my Top 10 favorite bands of all time, or anything, but they have an underrated catalog. Much like this song. "Photograph" was the first song I ever remember hearing by them. Of course, they later found more notoriety with "The Freshmen" but the sick organ track that underpins this song is not to be denied. Give it a listen if you don't recall this song.
"Cup Of Tea" is also another underrated song by The Verve Pipe.
17) "Lakini's Juice" by Live
There is no arguing that "Throwing Copper" is Live's best record. However, my favorite overall song by Live is "Lakini's Juice." If you can't tell by now, I am a huge fan of dirty, deep guitar riffs. The distorted bass creeps into your ears like a burrowing earwig. It also uses excellent subtle placement of string arrangements. You can't go wrong here.
18) "Still Remains" by Stone Temple Pilots
The only band with two songs on the list. I just couldn't leave this one off. It makes the list with the following line alone: "Take a bath, I'll drink the water that you leave." It's pretty gross, twisted love song- and I love it.
19) "Little Things" by Bush
My band in high school used to rock the shit out of this song in our garages. One of our favorites to cover, "Little Things" is simple yet rocking. Why Bush didn't take the music industry by the throat and skull-fuck it, I'll never understand. "Sixteen Stone" is amazing. The rest of their catalog... just ok. This song deserves a spot on the list though.
What's that? You want shirtless Gavin Rossdale from Woodstock '99? Ok!
20) "Tomorrow" by Silverchair
Silverchair deserves a spot on the list. This is their first hit single in the US and probably their catchiest song (at least from their early catalog.) This song is most impressive given that it was written, performed and recorded by 14/15 year olds. Daniel Johns sings like a 40 year old. It is a solid song to round out the Top 20.
And so ends my Top 20. I should do this again in 3 months and I bet I'd get a different list. Enjoy all the Game 5's coming up, they should be fairly entertaining.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
No Post Today
This is one of the busiest weeks I've encountered during my life, in general. If the posts are lacking, I apologize. I would have much rather watched the MLB playoffs yesterday than do what I was actually doing. Now, I'm debating listening to Danzig all day and getting in a few fist fights.
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
Ain't Nothin' Like A Good Ol' Fashioned Hitler Comparison
Well, I lost in the MSFL due to the best game Josh Freeman will ever play. Think about this, if you and I were in a street fight, and I continually pounded you in the gut over and over and over and over, would you, at any point, decide to protect your stomach? Would you try a different strategy? I feel like the Colts allowed that center of the field screen pass far too often and those plays were the death of the Colts. Nice work, fellas. Way to be, by far, the worst team in the league.
So I had a 1-2 Fantasy Football week, but the Bears did escape with a win against the Carolina Laptop Thieves. I suppose I did not have as bad a week as, say, this guy:
Monday Night Football decided to pull the usual Hank Williams, Jr. intro from the air because of comments he made earlier that day likening President Obama to Hitler. And while I agree that he did NOT say, "Obama is like Hitler" or something exactly like that, as a public figure one should know better than to throw around the Hitler card. It has the exact opposite value for your public image as a Ken Griffey, Jr. Upper Deck rookie card.
Look, we are not debating politics on this site. It is the last thing on Earth that I want to do and this is coming from a guy who regularly plays "Don't Stop Believing" on acoustic guitar, in public, for money. The debate is not about whether or not Hank, Jr. should be allowed to make whatever comments he wants, he should be able to do whatever he wants. However, ESPN is also allowed to do what they want, and they have the freedom to pull his intro from MNF if they want.
I was listening to Colin Cowherd on this issue, and he actually said something smart and worthwhile! Good for him! He pointed out that people of the extreme right who are crying out for "free speech" may want to think back a few years ago on how angry they were toward a different group of Country singers- The Dixie Chicks.
The Dixie Chicks made some comments that reflected their poor opinion of George W. Bush and Conservatives destroyed them. Seriously, think about the last time you've heard a Dixie Chicks song. I can't think of it, because I literally think they were wiped off the face of the Earth. I suppose they bit the hand that fed them because Country music has more ties to the Republican right, but I digress. The lack of consistency is the problem. Both sides of the political spectrum should be held accountable when saying extreme, outlandish, or offensive things through the mass media. As a public figure, you should not the hot buttons that you should never press. Hint: Hitler is one of them.
Freedom of speech is a great 1st amendment. No bullshit. I love using it here on this site to make crude jokes that are in no way serious. However, I'm not famous. In fact, I've tried to make myself anonymous to avoid repercussions of my sarcasm. Hank, Jr. is a public figure and while he can call Obama "Hitler," "Judas," or "Darth Vader" in the comfort of his own home, I'm guessing that it is not smart to make a remote comparison on a national television show.
People often wonder why Michael Jordan or Tiger Woods worked so hard to stay away from political issues. Here, my friends, is a perfect example of why they were awfully smart to keep the ball in the middle of the fairway. When you make political or offensive statements one way as a public figure, the other side will take issue and the repercussions could be serious.
This conversation with myself was boring and stuffy. Anyone know any good dead baby jokes?
So I had a 1-2 Fantasy Football week, but the Bears did escape with a win against the Carolina Laptop Thieves. I suppose I did not have as bad a week as, say, this guy:
Look, we are not debating politics on this site. It is the last thing on Earth that I want to do and this is coming from a guy who regularly plays "Don't Stop Believing" on acoustic guitar, in public, for money. The debate is not about whether or not Hank, Jr. should be allowed to make whatever comments he wants, he should be able to do whatever he wants. However, ESPN is also allowed to do what they want, and they have the freedom to pull his intro from MNF if they want.
I was listening to Colin Cowherd on this issue, and he actually said something smart and worthwhile! Good for him! He pointed out that people of the extreme right who are crying out for "free speech" may want to think back a few years ago on how angry they were toward a different group of Country singers- The Dixie Chicks.
 |
| Outside of their current natural habitat. |
Freedom of speech is a great 1st amendment. No bullshit. I love using it here on this site to make crude jokes that are in no way serious. However, I'm not famous. In fact, I've tried to make myself anonymous to avoid repercussions of my sarcasm. Hank, Jr. is a public figure and while he can call Obama "Hitler," "Judas," or "Darth Vader" in the comfort of his own home, I'm guessing that it is not smart to make a remote comparison on a national television show.
 |
| Pictured: Barak Obama |
This conversation with myself was boring and stuffy. Anyone know any good dead baby jokes?
Monday, October 3, 2011
NFL Week 4
That was quite the interesting week of football (but aren't they all?) A few impressions before moving on to the Fantasy Football update:
- This site always starts with the Bears. What a frustrating game. Granted, I didn't watch any of it besides highlights and internet updates, but I followed the updates play by play. At one point, I was scared shitless that the Bears were going to get an INT for a TD, a punt return for a TD, AND well over 100 yards of rushing from Matt Forte and still lose. Luckily, Forte's grand finale of earning over 200 yards sealed the game away. However, Cam Newton embarrassed the Bears' D. He sliced them up like a hot knife through a street whore. That garbage TD to Greg Olsen at the end of the game was murder fantasy-wise. Ugh. At least they got the win, though. With the Packers and Lions both advancing to 4-0, the season was pretty much over right there if they had blown this game.
- The San Francisco 49ers!!! WTF?! They certainly do not win pretty, but their defense buckled down, held off the Eagles and the Niners were able to muster enough offense to win. Someone in one of my fantasy leagues started Alex Smith! He is going to win and I believe that no one should be rewarded for such idiocy. Anyway, the two-headed beast of Gore and Hunter have put the Niners in first place of the NFC West by 2 games! They also sent the "Dream Team" to 1-3. [Insert Nelson's laugh from "The Simpsons."]
- The Buffalo Bills are still pretty badass. They got caught in a trap game. I hope they are able to rebound. They are more likable than Wheelchair Cat.
- Drew Brees and New Orleans Saints got the win on Sunday. However, they left far too many points on the field. In Breesus I trust, but c'mon Drew! Let's take the bull by the horns.
- I want to fight the Ravens. All of them. The Jets got absolutely drilled on Sunday night. Unfortunately, fantasy-wise, the Jets' D was able to score more fucking points than the Jets scored actual points. Simply disgusting. If I lose this week, I blame the Ravens for winning one of the most gutless performances I've ever seen for a team scoring 34 points and winning.
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MSFL:
Murder Panties 153 - Your Mom 141
My previous rant was about this exact sitch. I'm now up 12, with no one left to go. Money Shot commenter Li'l Strut still has Josh Freeman. I am cheering for Dwight Freeney to give Josh Freeman two charlie horses, an Indian burn, a pink belly, and dislocated knee cap during the Bucs' first possession on MNF. The over/under on highlights from that MNF game a few years ago where Peyton Manning engineered a re-donk-u-lous comeback to defeat a John Gruden-led Bucs team is at 547. I'm sure Chucky will have plenty of stupid things to say about that game.
Cali Not Keepers:
Peppermill High Rollers 119 - Balls On Chin 71
After a disappointing loss last week, the High Rollers rebound to turn another team's team name against them (that's right, my balls are on their chin!) Unless Reggie Wayne scores 49 points, I will reclaim my seat atop the league. Seriously, I have the best team in this league.
Family and Friends:
CORE 98.68 - Razzle Dazzle 142.12
I've pretty much given up in this league. I made some poor drafting decisions. I need to make some trades and see if anything pans out. Phillip Rivers can put his own balls on his chin. To add insult to injury, I have no one left and Razzle Dazzle still has Joseph Addai. Aaron Rodgers is scary as fuck and I don't appreciate getting dominated like that.
---
Alright Josh Freeman- tank it for me. Let your RB's take over. Hell, score 11 points- that's cool. But not 12. Score 12 and you will get at least a fist wag from yours truly. Also, a big shout out to my wife as it is our two-year anniversary. It feels like we've been married FOREVER... in a good way!
- This site always starts with the Bears. What a frustrating game. Granted, I didn't watch any of it besides highlights and internet updates, but I followed the updates play by play. At one point, I was scared shitless that the Bears were going to get an INT for a TD, a punt return for a TD, AND well over 100 yards of rushing from Matt Forte and still lose. Luckily, Forte's grand finale of earning over 200 yards sealed the game away. However, Cam Newton embarrassed the Bears' D. He sliced them up like a hot knife through a street whore. That garbage TD to Greg Olsen at the end of the game was murder fantasy-wise. Ugh. At least they got the win, though. With the Packers and Lions both advancing to 4-0, the season was pretty much over right there if they had blown this game.
- The San Francisco 49ers!!! WTF?! They certainly do not win pretty, but their defense buckled down, held off the Eagles and the Niners were able to muster enough offense to win. Someone in one of my fantasy leagues started Alex Smith! He is going to win and I believe that no one should be rewarded for such idiocy. Anyway, the two-headed beast of Gore and Hunter have put the Niners in first place of the NFC West by 2 games! They also sent the "Dream Team" to 1-3. [Insert Nelson's laugh from "The Simpsons."]
- The Buffalo Bills are still pretty badass. They got caught in a trap game. I hope they are able to rebound. They are more likable than Wheelchair Cat.
 |
| "Give me the bag bitch, or I will cut you!" |
| "It's a metaphor... but that actually happened." |
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MSFL:
Murder Panties 153 - Your Mom 141
My previous rant was about this exact sitch. I'm now up 12, with no one left to go. Money Shot commenter Li'l Strut still has Josh Freeman. I am cheering for Dwight Freeney to give Josh Freeman two charlie horses, an Indian burn, a pink belly, and dislocated knee cap during the Bucs' first possession on MNF. The over/under on highlights from that MNF game a few years ago where Peyton Manning engineered a re-donk-u-lous comeback to defeat a John Gruden-led Bucs team is at 547. I'm sure Chucky will have plenty of stupid things to say about that game.
Cali Not Keepers:
Peppermill High Rollers 119 - Balls On Chin 71
After a disappointing loss last week, the High Rollers rebound to turn another team's team name against them (that's right, my balls are on their chin!) Unless Reggie Wayne scores 49 points, I will reclaim my seat atop the league. Seriously, I have the best team in this league.
Family and Friends:
CORE 98.68 - Razzle Dazzle 142.12
I've pretty much given up in this league. I made some poor drafting decisions. I need to make some trades and see if anything pans out. Phillip Rivers can put his own balls on his chin. To add insult to injury, I have no one left and Razzle Dazzle still has Joseph Addai. Aaron Rodgers is scary as fuck and I don't appreciate getting dominated like that.
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Alright Josh Freeman- tank it for me. Let your RB's take over. Hell, score 11 points- that's cool. But not 12. Score 12 and you will get at least a fist wag from yours truly. Also, a big shout out to my wife as it is our two-year anniversary. It feels like we've been married FOREVER... in a good way!
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